Breastfeeding the girl is seriously different from breastfeeding the boy.
With the boy, it’s “feed me and then let me go to sleep!”
With the girl, it’s “feed me, let me rest a bit, let me sleep, aargh, I’m awake, I want the boob again…now, let’s do it all over again” O_O
Needless to say, I am stuck to the bed and to her for 1-2 hours and I can’t even take a decent nap!
Imagine this:
3.30 am Breastfeed
Breastfeeding her takes only 10 minutes but waking her up takes 1-1.5 hours!!!
7.30 am Breastfeed
Bark at the boy to finish his breakfast, change his clothes and shoo him out of the door
Eat my breakfast or brush my teeth (sometimes breakfast first!)
Go online or take a breather
Go to the toilet
Pick up some stuff etc
10.00am Breastfeed
10.30 amShe’s satisfied and lets go. I hold my breath and wait. If she doesn’t budge, I slowly exhale and try to go to sleep.
10.35am The auntie chops the chicken / fries some vege / drops a pot cover and the Big Eyes flutter open. And of course, the little tongue does its mouthing action. I oblige and offer one boob.
11.00am She’s satisfied and lets go. I wait again…
11.20am She’s back on the same boob!
12.00nn She lets go and I wait. My stomach growls. My eyelids droop. My blood pressure rises. I tell the auntie I’ll eat later.
12.20 pm I offer the other boob because that first boob is SORE already. Ugh, it’s tough moving from one side of the bed to the other 
(I hate C-sections!!!)
1.00 pm She lets go. I’m RAVENOUS and GRUMPY. The boob is also getting SORE.
1.30 pm I give up and gives her to the auntie for a bottle of formula. Wolfs down my lunch and then try to get some work done but I’m so exhausted, my brain can’t focus…
3.00 pm I crawl to crash out on the bed.
5.00 pm I wake up and try to gather my brain cells and do something. She sleeps on…
6.00 pm The tiny terror comes home but the poor boy is so used to Mummy being confined to her room, he’ll skip in to announce, “Mummy, I am home!” and then skips out again to bug the other people.
Sometimes, she wakes and I breastfeed her. If not, she can sleep till 7.30 pm!
Am I doing something wrong? Her feeding pattern is so unlike the boy that I don’t think I can continue with direct breastfeeding. I’ve just started pumping the boob she doesn’t feed on in the hope of increasing its output.
After 3 pumping sessions, I’ve increased its output from 1 teaspoon —> 3 teaspoons —-> 1/2 oz. I’m encouraged by this and hope that I’ll be able to build a good supply for others to help bottlefeed her.
UPDATED: I just read this Mum’s post about breastfeeding and pumping for her newborn, which sounds EXACTLY like what I’m experiencing 
Gonna breastfeed direct her during the day as long as she wants to and scouting around for good deals on the Medela Freestyle!
{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }
Aiyo… poor you.
I’m slightly luckier as Glenn only feeds every 3 hours so my boobs will sure be engorged by then. She can’t finish one boob most of the time unless she sleeps more than 5 hours in one go. Maybe she is still jaundiced so when she is better her pattern might change!
I agree with you about the different style by both boy and girl. Darrius was like the boy, feed me and let me sleep and he seldom let go and ask for it again. Glenn on the other hand will suck for a while, lets go, wait and want to suck again or sometimes she will lick lick (coz the milk was leaking) and don’t cover the nipple so milk will flow off and wet everything that was on the way…. *sigh*
Can imagine the exhaustion from lack of naps. In the early weeks, boy fed very slowly (30-40 min) and would fall asleep until the next feed (2-3+ hours apart). Then he started waking every 45min – 1.5hrs for comfort sucking as he was a very light-sleeper. We finally co-slept and he is getting better at 10mths old, longest stretch slept is only 2-3 hours though.
If he was cranky while I was hungry, I latched him on while using My Breast Friend pillow and eat.
Hope you’ll recover from C-section soon and the days shall get better!
you’re not doing anything wrong. unfortunately, Baby’s needs are just different. haye li’s the same, wants the boob ALL the time and i hardly got any rest too. and sadly, the next few months will be like that. well for me anyway. hope she gets better.
each baby is just different.
as for the pumps, dual pumps sounds excellent but u will have to do with extra parts too, unlike if you’re just using one-sided pump. sounds pricey but would be worth it if you’re going back to work.
tk care! and here’s an early wish for a happy and merry christmast! hope hubs is back?!
Both my boys feed non-stop too..and i can understand your frustration.
At night, i stop counting how many times they wake up to nap. With Dylan, i learned to just let him sleep next to me and feed all night long. That way, i get my sleep and he gets all the feed he needs.
Sounds tiring! Of course I’m the lousiest person to give you advice on breastfeeding.
Take care. Don’t force yourself to do stuff just because everyone in the whole world says it’s “good for the baby”. Hey, mums are important too!!!
I totally agree to this.
When i first bf my girl, she took so long to nurse, sleep, nurse again…very tiring.
Then when I bf my boy, wow..feed every 3 hrs fixed timing, so I got time to shower, eat and sleep, very relaxing
Err.. just try your best to fix her into a schedule? Hv u read Gina Ford’s “Contented Baby”? I’m one of those ‘gotta-have-routines-to-save-my-live” people.
‘life’ not ‘live’. hah..i still need more sleep!
I thought I’m the only one who thought that way! Yes, girls are fussier!
My elder boy was so much easier to breastfeed – fixed intervals; latch, suck, giggle and be happy, sleep through the night at 2 month old -> I was such a relaxed mama then
When it was my girl’s turn -> no routine/ pattern AT ALL *pengsan*
But hang on there… it’ll get better, I’m sure!
heheh.ur girl sounds exactly like mine. she nurses for 10 minutes, then play for 10 minutes, then nurse again for another 15 minutes, then wants to “dukung dukung ” for another 20 minutes. after work, all i seem to do is nurse and play with her!
the good thing is , they dont stay small for long. so , what i keep telling myself is, cherish the moments while it last!, soon, they will start crawling, and walking, and running, and before you know it, they will become young ladies already!
Medela Freestyle and Medela Pump In Style now come standard with the SoftFit breastshields.
I don’t use my SoftFits though because my nipples would rub against the sides of the flanges and it’s very painful. I’m currently using the standard size PersonalFit flanges. You can try a bigger size if you think you need them. Do look up Medela’s website as they do have an article on finding the right breastshields size.
Some mamas prefer Pumpin Pal (this is non Medela pumping accesories) because of the bigger flanges.
I hope you and your baby are doing fine. Do check whether she is really nursing or she’s just suckling for comfort. Some babies just want the comfort of mama’s boobies
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With my first son, I could barely have some decent nap because he would nurse about 5 minutes, then go back to sleep, and then wake up again 15 min or half an hour later to nurse again. Sometimes I get lucky if he slept for 1-2 hours.
With my second one, he takes at least 15 minutes or more to nurse and can really sleep for hours. But I still can’t get a decent nap because the big brother would want his turn for my attention. Sigh…..
KittyCat: Thanks for giving such detailed feedback about the Medela Freestyle. I was really, really apprehensive about spending nearly RM2,000 on a breast pump without being 100% sure it’ll work for me. Now, I know
Hi Mama, it does get better. Each child is very different. Don’t get discouraged though, because she could also be going through a growth spurt. Yea for you for keeping up with it.
u really sounds stressful & tired, sigh!
and this is really scaring me….but hopefully with mine not being a girl (hehe), it’ll mean less problem. i got avent single electric pump coz i know no way i’ll survive with manual.
wish u luck
KittyCat: I thought it’s a boy vs girl situation too until I read Farrah’s response above. She has 2 boys and one of them is a fast nurser while the other is a slower one
She is treating you as pacifier I think.
ur girl sounds like mine when she was a new born. i know how u feel. i breast-fed her for about 2 months plus. it takes a lot of patience to breast-feed … dun worry just relax … u’ll be fine.
I agree with Paik Ling, we all know that breastmilk is best for baby, but don’t force yourself if you are too tired.
Don’t get me wrong, I am 100% pro-bf and I felt so guilty that I didn’t bf my girl long enough. Now with my boy, I am still bf him, but I started giving him formula in bottle since 7 months, so that he will fuss less when going out.
If you plan to have no 3 and no4 and so on, then a good breast pump is a good investment, other wise, it is quite an expensive item to have just for a few months, or even 1 year, just my opinion.
KittyCat: Thanks for being so honest, Chew Lee. I had the impression that your boy is on 100% breastmilk. Because my boy was breastfed until he was 9 months, I would like to do the same for the girl too (or at least till she’s 6 months old).
Hubby is OK about my getting the Medela Freestyle if I really wanted it to:
a) pump 5 times a day for bottle feeding and
b) increasing my milk supply so that I even have excess to add to the boy’s milk.
It’d probably be worth it at RM100+ per month IF I used it for 18 months. However, the thought of having to clean and sterilize so many parts 5 times a day (on top of cooking, caring for the baby and doing a bit of work) is rather daunting!
Still thinking about it and I appreciate your comment about spending so much money on the pump esp as it could go towards other expenses on the girl.
Dear Mums – Thank you so much for the supportive and encouraging comments. And also for sharing your experiences and thoughts.
They made me assess my situation and do what’s within my ability. As I’m aiming to breastfeed her for 6 months, splurging on the Medela Freestyle (which is really, really attractive) doesn’t make sense since I’m not a full-time working Mum.
Also, I prefer to breastfeed direct vs pumping, which I had to do when I was away at work.
Supplementing once 1-2 oz after breastfeeding her allowed me to take a decent nap and wake up energized and in a better mood
I’m also happy to share that the lazy boob is producing more and I’ll use the Avent Isis to boost it when I have the energy.
It’s been 1 month and 1 week already and I’m really looking forward to the time when “it’ll get better”!
be more patient. she will give u a routine soon. just dont give up! kar yau!!
It’s not a girl vs boy thing. I had the exact reverse situation – Yiu Yiu was like her while Yan Yan is like him, so I have it easy this time round
I was contemplating Medela PIS too coz I didn’t want to spend too much time expressing at work but since we may not want a 3rd child, I didn’t want to spend so much on the pump. So I thought of getting a 2nd hand pump, and was practically glued to eBay the whole time during my maternity leave waiting to catch a good buy.
I actually won a bid for a relatively new 2nd hand pump, but regretted it later after doing more research on used pump. Luckily the seller was kind enough to allow me to rescind on my purchase, as I offered to pay for her relisting fees, etc. So I’m still using my trusty old Avent ISIS.
Sorry for being so long-winded
Merry Xmas and Blessed 2010, and may she “gets better” real soon so mummy can have some decent rest.
I only breastfed my No.2 and even then, I supplement with formula, so can’t really compare. Anyway, just do your best and don’t force yourself like it’s a do or die thing to breastfeed. It’s important but so is your health.
I am sure she’ll established a better routine in the next couple of month. Take care and rest well.
Wen – It’s getting better now but this girl has a habit of clamping her gums on me!
A Mom’s Diary – eBay huh? I’m eyeing the Avent Isis Duo (which is a closed system and OK even if used).
This time, I’m getting tired (or lazy) using the Avent Isis Manual
Happy New Year to you too!
oooohhhh… i bought the Avent ISIS pump but had never used it.. instead i loaned it out 3 times already.. haha.. reason is the pump did not work for me. Not sure why… Breasts become painful and milk expression is so slow. Instead I use my hands to pump my breast milk! Took me about 15-20 mins each time to express about 8oz of milk. I never let my kids latch on and well, I managed to breastfeed for about 6 months…
Maybe you can try to express your milk and feed your baby at “fixed” intervals? And when you are tired, you could ask your confinement lady or mum or hubby to feed her
Oh dear, same here. Mine is just 3 months and she is getting better. But still, on my breast pretty often that I lost count. With my elder girl, was worse, she was on my breast almost the whole day…. sigh…