The Chinese preschool
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When we visited the few preschools , many of the Mums commented that Lucas would have NO problem adjusting to preschool.
As it turns out, the little fella was FANTASTIC!
However, I was bewildered by the Chinese language, China’s one-child policy, the Chinese early childhood education system and Chinese culture…
DAY 1
He woke up at 8 am, happily chomped down the banana pancakes using a fork and plate all by himself, which is a surprise actually.
Then, he wanted to watch his favourite Tigger movie and do a bit of bouncing 
I told him he can a bit as we need to be at school by 9 am. He cheekily replied, “Kua tampok (Hokkien=I’ll only watch a bit).”
We managed to get to school on time – to a CIRCUS of:
- LOUD dance music blaring from speakers surrounding the school,
- groups of children from various ages dancing at the lead of young, pretty, spritely teachers in uniforms,
- parents streaming in and out of rooms, scattered around the gate, the playground – everywhere,
- CRYING, WAILING, HOWLING, KICKING, SCREAMING children either carried, dragged or ushered by teachers, ayis (either their own or the school’s), parents or grandparents.
My worst nightmare of a kindergarten (you er yuan) come true!!!
We went to the Principal’s (yuan chang) office and was directed to a classroom upstairs. Empty except for a pregnant lady. No uniform. Not the teacher, not the ayi – she’s the teacher’s assistant.
She’s nice and helped me find his name, which of course is his Chinese name, despite my MANY repeats that he responds only to Lucas!
The teacher? A *very* young girl with blue contact lenses in a yellow, spaghetti-strapped, organza dress with red bra straps showing.
Wow…she reminds me of Aki Ross of the anime “Final Fantasy: Spirits Within” and Vicky Zhao Wei!
Hey, I’m all for teachers looking attractive but come on…
Ms. Spaghetti Strap is tried to be creative with this out-of-the-box idea:
She asked the toddlers were to get them to help her pick up a big box of puzzles she had PURPOSELY emptied on the floor.
Haha, she had my sympathy when she had to pick them all up by herself…does she think toddlers are stupid?
Lucas headed for the toys along with 2-3 others – a few Mums were surprised that it’s his first day and that we’ve only been in China for less than a year
Then, 7-8 bawling, howling, LOUD kids came in:
“WO BU YAO SHANG XUE! WO YAO HUI JIA! WO YAO MAMA/NAI NAI!” (I DON’T WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL! I WANT TO GO HOME! I WANT MAMA/GRANDMA!
OH MY GOD! I love kids but can’t stand crybabies.
The teacher, teacher’s assistant and ayi divided themselves among the Seven Screamers. I’d settled down at the back of the room to remain in the background when suddenly, Lucas howls like crazy!
I saw another kid running away with the rattle he was playing with and wearily got the teacher to intervene. Since they were busy with the crybabies, I went up to the boy and asked, “Da wan na ge sian…ni ker yi wan pie de dong xi ma? Da wan hau le chai kei ni hao bu hao?” (He was playing with that toy first, can you play with something else? You can play with it after he’s done.)
He stared at me stonily.
Lucas wouldn’t stop crying (with tears rolling down his cheeks) and then I saw him raising his thumb:
HE WAS BITTEN BY THE BULLY!
I soothed him (took a while unlike himself) and showed it to the 2 adults but they barely addressed the boy.
After a while, Lucas went back to play but I kept an eye on the Bully. He again went for Lucas and purposely grabbed any toy he was holding.
Tired of the crying (it’s already 9.40 am) I asked if there are other bao bao ban (baby class) and they directed me next door. Classroom management was much better there that I asked if I could switch. I had to see the Principal.
I brought Lucas to the next class to play and then went to see the P. I got the VP (fu yuan chang) and told her the situation. She tried to dissuade me but I invited her to see both classes herself.
While she assured me that the teachers in the first class are capable (to dissuade me from switching), I pointed out that:
- The 2 teachers and ayi have their hands full with 7 crying, clinging children,
- Lucas is happy to attend preschool with NO fuss until this episode – do they want another crying, clinging kid?
- We are new to this country and my son speaks NO Chinese except for Ni hao, Xie Xie and Bu Yao.
We got the change and by 10 am, I could leave the room in peace. Lucas coolly waved and said,
“Bye, bye! See you…”
and even gave me a hug and a cheek-to-cheek.
At 12, I got a call saying he wouldn’t stop crying and could I come? When I arrived 10 mins later, he had slept. A Chinese man was yelling at the guard to open the locked gate so he could come in to see his son. I bet you if I hadn’t shown up, the guard (bao an) would not have admitted him.
I decided to go after I changed his nappy – they got it the wrong side on i.e. tapes to the back! Poor guy…how he must have struggled (sigh, sigh, sigh)
At around 4 pm, I took a taxi to the school to pick him up and go home in the minibus. He WAS ecstatic to see me and yelled, “Mummy come back! Come back again!” with a huge smile The new teachers say he’s very “kuai” and “pang” (What on earth is “pang”? It’s a different tone from the fat “pang”)
DAY TWO
Another fabulous day where we woke up at 6 am, got a good breakfast and went to wait for the bus on time. He loves sitting near the window…I don’t love the bumpy, careening ride of the safety belt-less minibus.
I also don’t like the accompanying teacher telling me 2 little boys came in the minibus on their own already.
SEVEN SCREAMERS: THE SEQUEL
DAY THREE
I was a bit worried because he refused the night milk even though I tried several times throughout the night – usually, even if he’s sleepy, he’d still drink. My friend’s daughter refused milk entirely after it was given in a cup. Already, he doesn’t eat a lot, he’s gonna stop drinking milk???!!!
Again, I’m told about another little girl who’s independently on the minibus…
At the playground, he was roughly pushed off 2 metal steps when he merely touched the elder boy’s shirt trying to get to another section of the play house. Both Mums were yelling when the scuffle took place – too late, Lucas was down.
I was mad coz I couldn’t climb up to help – 2 young teachers quickly climbed up and brought him to me. I WAS REALLY PISSED! We go to playgrounds a lot in Malaysia…in general, the older kids are watchful of little ones nearby.
After sending him off to his class, (SEVEN SCREAMERS STAY STRONG) I went downstairs to think about what to say to the the P or VP. I still couldn’t get the P and got the VP instead.
I told her what happened last night – can I know what they do in class? I’m given some general explanation and I started to tell about the playground when suddenly, I started to cry!
Crap, I wasn’t expecting to do that but I guess I was just overwhelmed by the whole drama. I got really worked up and lashed out:
- This is not a bilingual school. Everything is in Chinese!
- He’s happy on the first day. There are 2-3 kids who are also happy and are not crying but they are neglected. If you don’t give attention to the good ones, they’ll be bored and get up to mischief. By then, you’re sure to label them naughty!
- We are not Chinese. We need time to adjust. I will not let go until I am sure he’s safe and secure here.
- Your teacher on the bus tells me about this kid and that kid coming on his / her own. Frankly, I don’t care about what the other mothers do. This is MY son. He is a child, he is not a bag. I am NOT going to leave him in the minibus alone until he’s bigger. Is your teacher going to be responsible for him if anything happens? Are you?
- I want to understand how you do things here but nobody is helping me, explaining things to me. You need to help me too – I need hand-outs in English!
Phew…I don’t know if she understood me but I think she was flabbergasted when I finished!
She brought an English speaking teacher to explain the class timetable and preschool routine to me. At last, we communicate.
DAY FOUR
Lucas didn’t want to change but I manage to persuade him with a Thomas t-shirt He looks a bit tired today that I decided he’ll be off tomorrow.
In class, he wouldn’t let me go and asked me to read “Sir Handel” over and over again.
During the English sing-song, he perked up and joined in the actions. But the other teacher made a wrong move – she grabbed Lucas and my chair to make him join the group (we were sitting apart from them).
Seeing this, he started yelling and crying,
“Mummy! Mummy! Mummy chair!”
Obviously, they are not trained in child psychology – Mummy and her stuff are untouchable! Furthermore, who likes to be grabbed like a kidnap case???
I told her to let him down – I can leave when it’s toilet time. Eventually, he joined in the sing-song esp for “If You’re Happy”, “Row, row your boat”, “Twinkle, Twinkle” and “London Bridge”.
I rushed off to go marketing and be in time to let the maid in.
In the evening, he was just as happy to see me again and just now, he told me he’s “tired”.
Uh-oh, I don’t want to be burned out from preschool because if is, he’ll definitely HATE school by the it’s Standard One!
Day 5
Lucas is gonna wake up to a nice breakfast of toast and half-boiled eggs, reading sessions of Thomas, trains and transport and “The Enormous Turnip” and of course, lots of bouncing with Tigger…
P/S This ain’t the last of my thoughts on this topic. I’ve got more!!! Maybe after the Beijing Olympics on 8.8.08 at 8 pm event firstlah 
NOTE:
Girls turned out to be taller than the boys – even some who were 6 months younger than him!
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August 8th, 2008 at 11:01 am
*faint* you poor thing. it is such an agony having teachers like that who are not fully trained in handling kids or even the passion for it.
my elder’s kindy had chinese national teachers and the school decided not to hire them anymore after a while. the teachers were not passionate about children and even argued and fight among themselves (in front of the teachers).
oh i also forgot to tell you. I am in Singapore and my kids are attending the eduction system here thats why i was so stressed in my post.. hehehe
my elder girl is in Primary 2) and younger is 4 (nursery level). i find schooling stressful for kids.. sigh.
if the schools had Singaporeans, the complains will be non stop..hahaha. Singaporean parents are very comitted to education system and best for the kids so they compromise nothing. will post up more updates about school. but you can read my other blog too. http://sunnysideupfoodie.blogspot.com that I do post of the kids stuff sometimes.
August 8th, 2008 at 11:35 am
wah…. the seven screamers…quite a nightmare eh?
Actually, I really tabik pre-school teachers! They have to deal with a lot of crybabies everyday…… When I leave my kids at their pre-school, i’d quickly run away….I’m too chicken shit to look at them!!!
WEKEKEKEKEEKKEKEKEKEEKEKEKEK!!!
August 8th, 2008 at 12:46 pm
“Pang” means great / clever….it’s a positive compliment =>
motherhood really a challenge don’t they, hehehe….I’ll need all your help then (reading ur blog really do help ).
August 8th, 2008 at 2:28 pm
Mott – The Malaysian pasar malam is NOTHING compared to this ok…ugh, if I can help to reduce one crybaby, the world will be a better place, I think!
Lilis – Thanks for the explanation
Oh yes, the road is tough especially since it involves education. Now you know why your parents worried about you guys eh…hahaha Hmm, a pack of Indomie you and Yuliana made for me now would be wonderful after all this trauma!
August 8th, 2008 at 3:00 pm
Your little tyke will get used to it eventually and will probably love it. My daughter took a long time to adjust but she absolutely loves going to school now. But she only goes twice a week.
August 8th, 2008 at 3:34 pm
So did he go to school on Day 5? Yeah, why not just send him to school for 3 or 4 days a week only? 5 days a week is too hectic for a 2-year-old. And you’re right, if he keeps going to school 5 days a week starting from now until he’s 7 years old, he’ll be quite bored. And now school is not fun anymore. It’s full of pressure.
August 11th, 2008 at 2:25 pm
Constance – THANK for understanding! Sorry, your comment got stuck in spam earlier. Surprised to hear about the Chinese teachers in Singapore. If anything, I’d say the teachers in his school are VERY good because they are *extremely patient*.
Ann – He loved school from Day 1. He just got really tired of the crybabies! He’s a bit tired out that I wanna cut it down to 4 days…
Josette – No, he didn’t
I have been thinking about less days too because IT IS important that he likes school when it really matters, not now. Thanks for the input! I appreciate hearing from a younger person.
August 11th, 2008 at 11:35 pm
ohmygawd! Wat a nightmare! Poor u and lucas! A few things.. Pang-clever? bright? As in they like to say, hau pang! Very clever.. I learnt that from chinese shows. Hee hee
But i must tabik u both .. for your patience and him, adapting to new environments much much better than other kids. Gooly and I had moved to Bkk for over two years now. He is rejecting the thai language.. he is almost 4, but I am still keeping him at home till later. Like your posts, will definitely come back for more. Same issues we’re going thru.. two foreign moms in foreign lands. Sighs… oh well.. life goes on
August 13th, 2008 at 12:56 am
Oh dear! That finger looks painful! Tough being in a foreign land yeah, but you are coping very well, I must say.
August 13th, 2008 at 7:59 am
OMG!!!! Poor little guy! I really hate big bully!
I can’t believe this is happening…. pity you and little Lucas… must be real tough being alone there. Have you get any of your group of friends to give recommendations on the schools around the area?
Hope the coming days will be better…
Hugs to Lucas
August 13th, 2008 at 9:18 pm
Goolypop – Hi! I’m not that patient and you only need to ask Hubby to know the real story of how crabby I am with Lucas in the evenings. It’s really hard and I’m beginning to feel REALLY homesick now. Wow…Thai is even tougher than Chinese because they have 5 tones! All the best, hope your Gooly will grow to like it esp as Thais are really nice folks.
A Mom’s Diary – Yeah, I think it hurts which is why I got SO mad with the teachers on Day 1. Trying, trying…
Angeleyes – Yes, I hate bullies! And you know how easygoing Lucas is, right? Hmm…I wonder if I should teach him to be ‘tough’. This school was recommendedlah. Things are getting better now, thanks.
August 22nd, 2008 at 12:57 am
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